How to Avoid Divorce
and Save Your Marriage
Few
things can stop the emotional effects that a divorce has on a couple, especially
when children are involved. There once
was a time when you thought that there was no one greater then the person you
were about to marry. You made a
commitment to each other to stay together for the rest of your life. It is a fact of life that couples go through
hard times in their marriage. But before
you make a decision to get a divorce, you owe it to each other to try to save
your marriage first.
Married couples who are able to learn forgiveness and let go of unrealistic expectations can help improve their relationship. It is never too late to patch things up and restore the relationship that you both have devoted your lives to. Before final decisions are made to go through with a divorce, make a commitment to try to save your marriage -- and make it a happy one.
Many
couples who end up getting a divorce have tendencies to look into their
past. They have dwelt upon the mistakes
their partner has previously made, which has led them to a place of resentment
and an unwillingness to forgive. In
order to avoid a divorce a couple must focus on the present and embrace a
commitment to move forward. Truly
forgiving someone means forgetting about what it is that they have done to hurt
you. Forgiving someone does not mean that
you do not “win” or that your feelings did not matter or that you are the
weaker person by letting this go.
Forgiving someone means that you are stronger for being able to stand
the hurt that they have caused you and that you can allow the natural love that
resides in everyone’s heart to guide your decisions. Rather then putting all the blame on your
spouse, focus on making things right.
In
order to avoid divorce and save your marriage you should also be realistic
about your expectations about your relationship. When two people first get married, each one
comes into the marriage expecting it to be a certain way. Many times these expectations are quite
different and can cause conflict later on in the relationship.
Ladies, if you are engaged to someone who loves to watch football on a Sunday afternoon but you think that your Sunday afternoon should be filled with shopping, do not expect that once you get married your spouse will suddenly put their foam fingers aside to spend an entire Sunday shopping with you. While it would be a nice gesture for them to voluntarily go shopping with you instead of watching the big game, do not expect that on a weekly basis.
As much as we would like to, we can’t change our spouses. If they were a neat freak before you got married, they are going to be a neat freak throughout your lives together. Learn how to keep realistic expectations of how you would like the marriage to be in order to prevent yourselves from disappointing each other.
Ladies, if you are engaged to someone who loves to watch football on a Sunday afternoon but you think that your Sunday afternoon should be filled with shopping, do not expect that once you get married your spouse will suddenly put their foam fingers aside to spend an entire Sunday shopping with you. While it would be a nice gesture for them to voluntarily go shopping with you instead of watching the big game, do not expect that on a weekly basis.
As much as we would like to, we can’t change our spouses. If they were a neat freak before you got married, they are going to be a neat freak throughout your lives together. Learn how to keep realistic expectations of how you would like the marriage to be in order to prevent yourselves from disappointing each other.
Married couples who are able to learn forgiveness and let go of unrealistic expectations can help improve their relationship. It is never too late to patch things up and restore the relationship that you both have devoted your lives to. Before final decisions are made to go through with a divorce, make a commitment to try to save your marriage -- and make it a happy one.
